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Top 10 Reasons Relationships Fail

Multiple Blue Rings

Trust Issues

Lack or loss of trust is one of the most harmful contagions to a couple’s long-term success. Without trust, a relationship misses two key anchors to a strong bond: safety and security.

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Multiple Blue Rings

Different Expectations

It’s not easy for a couple to walk a journey together for a long time. The elements that frequently draw two people toward one another at the beginning of a relationship—physical attraction, sexual passion, common interests

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Moving Through Life at Different Speeds

When one partner is learning and growing at a rapid pace, while the other is stagnating, this may be a source of relational divergence.

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Compatibility Issues

Relational compatibility is a significant topic worthy of full volumes of its own. In my books, relationship compatibility is explored in detail from several perspectives, including compatibility in intimacy, compatibility in personality types, and compatibility in attachment styles.

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Communication Issues

This is a big one. Numerous studies have identified communication (or a lack thereof) as one of the top reasons for couples therapy, as well as one of the top reasons for break-up and divorce (1)(2).

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Narcissism

Narcissists have an inflated sense of their own importance and need to be admired. Narcissism is often marked by a lack of true intimacy in relationship

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Relational Abuse

For the purpose of this writing, relational abuse is defined as the repeated mistreatment of an individual. Examples of relational abuse include verbal, emotional, physical, and/or sexual abuse, pathological manipulation, pathological narcissism, pathological passive-aggressiveness, and excessive control and dominance.

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Life Habit Abuse

Life habit abuses are traits that, although they may or may not directly involve the partner (such as a secret gambling addiction), they may ultimately affect the relationship in a destructive way. Examples of life habit abuse include drug addiction, alcohol addiction, gambling addiction, and sexual addiction.

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Grown Apart, Boredom, Staleness, Rut

If any of the four terms written above resonates with your relationship experience, there are a couple of elements to consider:

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Money Issues

Money issues and disputes tap into some of our deepest psychological needs and fears, including and not limited to trust, safety, security, power, control, and survival.

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Multiple Blue Rings

The longer a couple has been together in a committed relationship, the greater the possibility of financial incompatibility. According to research, having differences over money is one of the top reasons for marital dissolution (

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What Makes a Relationship Healthy?