Dogs: pure love, 24/7. Happy, pee-in-excited greeting at door. Unmatched, unconditional affection.
Cats are indifferent. They see themselves as masters. If you died, they'd eat you after a missed meal.
Fish = plant in maintenance & value. Sunken treasure > fish. Bubbles = entertainment.
Dangerous pet snake. Needs blood sacrifices to prevent attacks. Don't mess with snake owners.
I mean, I can't blame you. Those hamster wheels are hilarious, and so is watching them get lost in their little mazes.
Birds evolved from dinosaurs, now mimic speech and poop in cages. The Flintstones didn't prepare me for this weirdness!
Human domestication of animals extensive. Captivity unnecessary, Tyson. Leave tigers in jungles.
3 types of pets: adorable, hilarious, or both. If you disagree, you're on a watchlist.